Where Has The Time Gone? by J. C. Kenney

As I write this, my house is quiet. It’s midafternoon. My wife Nancy is at work, and kitty cat Maria is in another room, napping in a patch of sun. The only sounds are the clicking of my keyboard keys, the whoosh of warm being pushed around by the furnace, and the gentle tinkling of water from Maria’s drinking fountain. All is quiet.

Yes, I’ve arrived at a new stage in my life. One that, as a parent of two kiddos, I spent a few days wondering whether I would ever get there. Yet, here I am.

Welcome to my first holiday season as an empty nester. 

As recently as a few months ago, both of my adult children were living at home. My younger kiddo’s fiancée was living with us, too. To be fair, there was plenty of room in the house for five adults and a cat, so overcrowding was never an issue. The kitchen did get a little crowded during the evenings when dinner preparations were going on, though.

Then, in August, younger kiddo started his first teaching job. Not long after that, he and his fiancée moved into their first apartment. New job, new digs—exciting times, indeed.

To borrow a line from the classic band Genesis, and then there were three.

Not for long, though. Older kiddo, who at age 27 has had a list of physical and mental health challenges that runs longer than a CVS receipt, moved to Cincinnati to live with their partner. With a decent paying job and plans to get married next Spring, older kiddo is living on their own for the first time. And thriving. It doesn’t get much better than that.

And now there are two (with apologies to Maria for not counting her as an adult human).

One of our jobs as parents is to prepare our children to make that great leap into living life on their own. When that day arrives, hopefully there’s a feeling of satisfaction, that as parents we did all right. We got them through school, the hormone-filled teen years, and into young adulthood. Now, we can kick back a bit.

As I’ve been kicking back, I’ve also been thinking about the fact that this is my first holiday season in twenty-seven years without a child in the house. That’s a lot of years’ worth of memories.

1996 – older kiddo’s first Christmas.

1999/2000 – celebrating Y2K with a little one while we hoped the computers didn’t crash and society as we knew it didn’t come to an abrupt end.

2001 – our first Christmas with two kids.

2004 – spending 3 hours building a Spiderman playset for younger kiddo. There may have been a few curse words dropped under my breath during that build.

2009 – celebrating the holidays in a newly renovated kitchen.

2011 – older kiddo having friends over to celebrate Festivus (thank you, Seinfeld).

2014 – our first holiday season with Maria.

2017 – older kiddo participating in holiday toasts with an adult beverage for the first time.

2021 – younger kiddo performing with his friends from Ball State’s Music School at three different churches for holiday services.

This year, we’ll be hosting both kiddos and their respective significant others on Christmas day. Another new first. And I hope to experience many more in the years to come. A first house for one of the kiddos? A first grandkiddo? Who knows?

That’s what I think makes this time of the year so special. We get to look back and reflect on the memories the holidays brought us. We also get to look forward, with hope in our hearts, to exciting days ahead. For us, and for good people everywhere. So, while I enjoy the quiet, I’ll take time to look back with a smile, then look ahead with optimism.

How about you? Does this time of year leave you asking where has all the time gone? Care to share a special memory? How about something you’re looking forward to? I’d love to chat about it with you. Cheers!

 

J.C. Kenney is the bestselling author of whodunnits featuring oddball amateur sleuths in even odder locales. He's also the co-host of The Bookish Hour and Bookish Moment webcasts. When he’s not writing, you can find him following IndyCar racing or listening to music. He has two grown children and lives in Indianapolis with his wife and a cat. You can find him at www.jckenney.com.