Needs, Wants, and Precedence

Last night, I dreamed about buying a new car, but the area was flooded and we had to go through water to do everything. Not in boats, just in water. It felt warm and I wasn't especially scared, but...water? I AM scared of water. When I got into my kids' hot tub, I didn't take a deep breath until I was in there and seated, and then I had to worry about getting out. (The half hour in between made it all worthwhile, believe me.)

This was an idiotic dream. To begin with, my car is only two years old and I love it to pieces--I have no wish for a new one. To go on with, I am scared of water. I would cheerfully wear a life preserver in the hot tub if one were offered. I've always said I'm afraid of bridges, too, but I'm not--it's the water underneath them. 

What I am taking the long way to get to is the word need. I love being around water, especially beaches in the Carolinas or the Panhandle in Florida, but I need to not go in that water any deeper than my knees. Ankles are better, but I don't want to be extreme. 

My husband and I, although we've been together over half a century, don't share the same values system on numerous things. We used to cancel each other out voting, have glaring conversations about labor-management situations, and stare at each other in disbelief that...you know...how could we possibly have been that mistaken when we chose a life partner?

We have learned, though, that while we will never agree on some pretty basic things, when we need the other one to stay on the side of marriage's slippery slope that they might not prefer, that need takes precedence over preference. When one of us--not naming names--needs to not have potato chips in the house, the other one has to suffer salt deprivation in response to that need. 

Which brings us to social media and politics. Yeah, I know, I'm sorry, but both of them really interest me and they definitely lend a cesspool consistency to our understanding of each other.

We need to respect opinions other than our own, we need to always tell the truth, we need to stop the name-calling. 

Did I say we? Well, yeah, I did. I have to remind myself daily to use the delete key! I don't play the whataboutism game, but I am a great one for posting opposing views and statistics that I have researched. While I believe strongly in what I present, the ones I say it to aren't going to change their minds any more than I am. So if I'm on their FB page, the delete key is a really good idea. Not calling anyone names or saying things that aren't wholly true (am I repeating myself?) is an even better one. 

Those things are like decency, kindness, love for others, and things to laugh at. They're things we need, and if they cost us something. that's okay, too.

Have a great week. Be nice to somebody. Even if you don't agree with what they say.