This is only 10 years old, downright new in the scheme of things for this reopened Window. But now I'm 66, even more than the song says.
And it's still exciting.
Me at 64--I'm sure I look even better now! |
"Will you still need me, will you still feed me,
When I'm sixty-four..." - Lennon / McCartney
It was exciting when I was six. I got a
doll for Christmas and a new red wagon for my birthday. My sister worked at a
department store and bought me cool clothes and married the mysterious stranger
who would raise my brother count to four. A huge limb came through a kitchen
window during a storm and I climbed my brother Joe like a tree, knowing beyond
all doubt that I was going to be taken care of.
Sixteen was exciting, too. I was able to
date as soon as someone asked me and I could drive a car on the road instead of
in the back pasture. I could wear makeup as long as my mother wasn’t paying a
lot of attention, and every now and then I used swear words in public. I’d
already witnessed that long, sad weekend when President Kennedy was shot, and
the even sadder one — for me — when my grandfather died, so I knew by then
that my brother couldn’t keep me safe anymore.
I loved being 26. I was done having
babies and we were buying our own house. Vietnam was finally over and I
could vote and even drink if I wanted to. My oldest son started playing
baseball and what fun that was—I had no idea I’d be spending the next 12 or so
summers on bleachers. It was an exciting time.
It wasn’t long till I was 36, ten years
into my bleacher time, and I was getting wrinkles. My kids were in varying
stages of adolescence and my hair was getting really, really gray. At least, I
think it was; I’ve never let the roots get long enough to be sure. It was the
best of times, being young enough to get up and down without groaning but old
enough to try and talk someone else into doing it for me.
Fifteen minutes later, I was 46. I was
catching onto having grandchildren, using a computer, and cooking in one-quart
saucepans. My husband and I rediscovered ourselves as a couple and found out we
canceled each other out in the voting booth. I discovered Walmart and he
discovered golf and the grandkids found out just how easy it is to run over
both of us. We started making a lot of age jokes even though they’re not all
that funny anymore and the veins in my legs took on a spidery look. And it was
exciting, being a couple again, with no one in the back seat criticizing our
driving.
And in the blink of an eye, it’s 2007 and
I’m 56. I remember my mom being 56 and she was a whole lot older than I am, a
phenomenon I haven’t quite figured out. My veins are worse, but I don’t care,
and we’re not even going to talk about my roots.
We’ve seen more horror in the past few
years than any of us can bear to think about. More than we can begin to
understand. There are more things in life to create anger than I can remember
there being before: terrorism, gas prices, politics, greed, “not my job, man,”
and the cost of prescription medicine, to name but a few. I catch myself
saying, “It wasn’t like that when I was your age,” because ... well, because it
wasn’t.
But you know what? It doesn’t help a thing
for me to wax nostalgic about what once was. It doesn’t bring back good
service, reasonable prices, or kindness. Like the generations before us, we’ve
made a bunch .. .oh, good grief, a huge bunch ... of mistakes that our kids and
grandkids have to clean up after. When I was your age, we were messing up the
air big time then because we didn’t know any better. But you do. Littering was
rude and inconsiderate; now it’s downright dangerous.
And there are things that have stayed the
same. Although cherry cokes and ice cream cones cost a lot less when I was a
kid, they tasted just the same. Pizza is just as sinfully good now as it was
then, even if you eat it cold the next day. Hot dogs and hamburgers still taste
special when they’re cooked on the grill and there’s not much that’s better
than a burned-to-a-crisp marshmallow.
Oh, and then there are the things that are
better. My car was seven years old and had 165,000 miles on it when I got a new
one, and we kept the old one because there was nothing wrong with it! I don’t
remember cars lasting that well when I was young. And this computer, while it
does have its tantrums, is so much easier to deal with than a typewriter. My
oven cleans itself and I have a machine that washes the dishes. Oh, yes, much
better.
So, like I said, I’m 56. And you know what?
It’s fun. Healthy days are not things you take for granted and sunshine is a
joy that fills your soul, not just your eyes. Grandkids are the reward you get
for having done something right with their parents, and if you don’t have any
of your own, it’s perfectly all right to borrow someone else’s.
We’ve just passed New Year’s, so spring
will be coming up soon. Days will be longer, grass green and new, and the sky
even bluer than we remember it from last year. Flowers and children will cover
the landscape with bright colors and sweetness. We’ll eat ice cream and
strawberries still warm from the sun and we’ll hold close the beauty of springtime graduates
and early summer brides. I’m 56. And it’s exciting.
Till next time.
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