Saturday, February 18, 2023

The Uncommon Cold by Liz Flaherty

Everything has become something more, hasn't it? I got a cold in November, which stretched into an eye infection, an ear infection, and me rethinking the whole getting old thing. I've really enjoyed it up until this winter, but that cold, eye infection, and ear infection lasted close to six weeks. I thought for sure Covid had caught up with me, but I passed the test each time and never for one minute lost my appetite. I'm the only person I know who gets sick and gains weight. 

I survived January. It was probably made easier because I spent it complaining about being sick through the holidays. To anyone who had to hear it more than once--not counting this time, I mean, I'm really sorry. It gets more dramatic with each telling, though, which I think makes listening worthwhile, but not everyone agrees. Instead, they start telling me about their own illnesses. The nerve of some people!

So, anyway, I got up this Tuesday morning feeling like hammered sh...wait, can I say that here? I try to keep it clean, so, no, but I felt awful. I couldn't go to a meeting I hated to miss, I think I increased my word count on the book-in-progress by minus-17, and I finally just crumpled into my recliner with a box of tissues and whined occasionally. I took a Covid test because I was absolutely sure I had it, but I didn't. I thought it was probably flu because I don't have my shot yet--I was too sick to get it when I usually do. But, no, I was pretty determined it was a 24-hour bug that probably wouldn't last more than...

Well, now it's about 96 hours. Not bad for a 24-hour thing, right? But the truth is, the common cold never lasts for 24 hours. It lasts for a week or seven days, whichever comes first, unless it's a really bad one, which lasts two weeks or 14 days. During those times, I usually decide I have bronchitis at least, pneumonia at most. I start to sort out my jewelry to be divided among my girls. You know, just in case. 

And, at the end of the very long day, it is indeed just a cold. It is when I most mind that new variants of old viruses have made us paranoid. Not so much about ourselves--at least those of us who've already lived most of our lives--but about passing something on to others. 

They can be so ungrateful when you do that. 

Have a good week. Pass me that box of Kleenex, would you? No, don't come too close. This'll only last 24 hours. I'll be better by Tuesday, although I'm not sure which one. 

Stay safe and stay well. Be nice to somebody. 



18 comments:

  1. You are too funny, Liz! Thank you for the laughing-out-loud gem today. Feel better, girlfriend. Gazoonhite!

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  2. Awww...poor baby. And this is hilarious and I love it, but poor baby. Hugs!

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    1. Thanks, Nan. I'm better now, thank goodness--at least for a couple of hours!

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  3. I feel your pain, Liz. Getting sick, and getting old, both suck!

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    1. I don't generally mind the old part so much, but the sick...yeah, sucks. Thanks, Jana!

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  4. I hope you feel great for the rest of winter. Summer’s coming😊

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    1. Oh, amen to that. The sky is blue this morning, which always gives me hope, plus I'm feeling better. Thanks, Suzanne!

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  5. I love this. You made me laugh over my coffee. The older I get the harder these not 24 hour bugs hit me. Sorry didn't mean to make it about me! I loved sorting your jewelry for your girls. When I was especially ill a couple of years ago I made my husband come into my closet so I could show him the dress to bury me in. Oops. Back to me again... hope YOU feel better soon!

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    1. Lol. I love hearing about you! It was so unexpected, that they hit so hard now, and I don't mind admitting I feel a little betrayed by it. Feeling better now, though.

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  6. I'm glad I stopped by!

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  7. Even ill, your wit and wisdom shine through! So sorry you've been under the weather, but boy oh boy, you sure made me laugh. Thanks a bunch! BTW: feel better soon! Susie Black

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    1. Thanks, Susie! I'm feeling better, but it's sure a bumpy road.

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  8. Funny! Not that you’re sick, of course, but the rest. Hope you feel better soon! Thanks for sharing your sense of humor with us!

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    1. I feel much better, but I'm STILL coughing! Thanks, Mary.

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